Emails leaked today by Wikileaks reveal that Hillary Clinton enjoys stamping cute little kittens to death. The kitten-killing is possibly a part of a money-making scheme, sponsored by Goldman-Sachs, involving the distribution of kitten-stamping snuff movies. Clinton also called you a phoney a bunch of times.
Clinton’s campaign was quick to distract commentators from the devastating revelations by releasing a recording of Donald Trump saying he finds hot women sexually attractive.
These latest twists in an increasingly baffling election season are sure to present the candidates in a new light as we approach the second debate.
Many have long suspected that Hillary Clinton is the sort of woman who would derive some sort of sick sexual pleasure from crushing cute defenseless kittens beneath her cruel gargoyle feet. The confirmation however may be too repulsive for most people to comprehend.
Similarly, proof that Donald Trump enjoys the company of, and sexual contact with, hot sexy statuesque models and hot women in general, has caused several journalists and commentators to splutter in shock and retreat into their asexual, beige-colored safe-spaces.
The news that Trump finds hot, sexy women hot and sexy has shocked many
In response to the revelations of her kitten-killing fetish Hillary Clinton stamped a kitten to death live on air, cackled in a ‘witch-like’ way, smacked a nearby orphan ‘upside the head’, spat diseased sputum onto a veteran, called you a phoney, and called the US electorate ‘a bunch of scum to be wiped away’ right to their faces while pointing directly at them with her long bony finger.
Polls currently put Clinton at 48%, and Trump at 41%.