Election 2016 is in the bag for Clinton due to left-wingers’ use of ‘Quantum Leap’ technology, claims a local historian.
Local history buff Trevor Morrison points outs that whenever a candidate appears who might abandon liberal dogmas he mysteriously “gets screwed over by history.”
“It happened to Goldwater and to Buchcanan,” says Morrison, “and I expect Trump to get screwed over anytime now.”
“The fact is that liberals in the future have access to Quantum Leap technology that allows them to change the past so that it’s more in line with what they want.”
Quantum Leap technology allows left-wing people from the future to ‘leap’ into the body of someone in the past and change history ‘for the better.’
There is already a petition asking Dr Sam Beckett of Project Quantum Leap to leap into Donald Trump and ‘change history for the better.’
“They claim to ‘put right what once went wrong,” says Morrison, “but they really just help left-wing causes and destroy conservative ones.”
Morrison believes that future liberal Dr Sam Beckett will leap into one of the candidates and, using his knowledge of what will happen, change history in Clinton’s favour.
“He could leap into Hillary and start doing all sorts of great stuff. Saving people’s lives and being a hero and stuff. Or he could leap into Trump and sabotage his campaign.”
Time traveller Dr Sam Beckett is well known for changing history in line with his liberal ideology.
“One time, Beckett met a young Donald Trump, but he didn’t do anything, which is odd,” says Morrison, “but still, if Trump starts acting crazy, it’s probably Beckett.”