The 2016 UK sheepdog trials may face an insurmountable problem as racist dog whistles are banned from the contest.
Organisers took the dramatic step of banning racist dog whistles from the contest after their attention was brought to the fact that racist dog whistles are responsible for all the ills of the world.
“A concerned citizen sent us articles from the New York Times, The New Yorker, Slate, Salon, The Washington Post, The Guardian, The Independent and a plethora of others all about the modern problem of racist dog whistles,” one organiser said yesterday, “so we realised that we had to ban them from the contest.”
Competitors are unhappy about the ban as their sheepdogs have been trained over many years to respond to the now banned dog whistles.
Racist dog whistles have been prominently denounced in recent months by respected outlets such as The New York Times and The Washington Post.
It is theorized that racist dog whistles are responsible for such wide-ranging events as the rise of presidential candidate Donald Trump, Britain’s Brexit referendum result, the rise of nationalism is Europe and many people’s apparent refusal to consider black lives matter to be a peaceful organization with valid points to make.
“What do they expect us to do?” asked last years’ runner-up James Innes-Edwards, “This isn’t the 1995 film, babe, my dog isn’t a clever pig and I’m not that farmer played by James Cromwell,” he added usefully.
There is some hope that next year’s sheepdog trials will not be affected by the ban as a British whistle manufacturer is reportedly set to patent an ‘anti-racism resin’ and will put an ‘anti-racism resin’ coated whistle into production by the end of the year.