After two years of Black lives Matter protests, after reading about recent murders of police officers by New Black Panther members and after hearing about the New Black Panthers’ plan for a black nation within the United States, white people have agreed that this plan sounds pretty great to them.
In an interview, Babu Omowale, defense minister of the New Black Panthers, said his group is attempting to form “our own government in a nation within a nation.”
The nation would comprise the states of Alabama, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi, and South Carolina.
“We just need to start migrating back to those states and taking control of the economics in those states. If black people move in, most definitely white people will move out. So it’s not a hard process for us to have our own country within a country,” said Omowale.
“This is a great idea!” said all peace-loving white people yesterday of the Black Panthers’ Plan.
“Let me get this straight in my own head,” said one man while trying to comprehend the brilliance of the plan, “Black people will get to live free of the white racism they’re always crying about, and we white folk get to be free of all the crime and violence of black people?”
“Where do I sign up?!” he then exclaimed while leaping into the air, clicking his heels and grinning enthusiastically.
Asians are also reported to be enthusiastic about the plan, “hey!” said a Korean man who owns a shop, “I wouldn’t have to sit in a bullet-proof box all day anymore!”
Some white people have helpfully suggested the Black Panthers crowdfund their plan through indigo go or Kickstarter. “I’d happily kick in a couple hundred,” said every white person upon hearing the idea.
“Alabama, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi, and South Carolina is a bit much, I think,” said one law-abiding, tax-paying person. “Let’s offer them Puerto Rico and negotiate from there.”